Truths Children Have Learned



  • No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats.
  • When your mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
  • If your brother hits you, don’t hit him back. They always catch the second person.
  • Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
  • You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
  • Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
  • Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
  • Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
  • Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
  • School lunches stick to the wall.
  • You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
  • Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.